Monday, October 08, 2018

thanking the community


Expatriates living in Mexico are like mixed couple marriages.

We get the best of both worlds when it comes to holidays. Mexican and American. And, in our particular part of Mexico, we get a third bunch as a bonus. Canadian.

Today was one of the latter. It is Canadian thanksgiving.

I have never heard a persuasive reason why our expatriate/tourist population is so heavily weighted in favor of Canadians. At least, not a theory I would be willing to commit to print. But, depending on who you talk with, during the winter months the mix is about 75-90% Canadian.

As the calendar would have it, the two big Canada-centric holidays (Canada Day and Thanksgiving) occur while most Canadians are enjoying their northern climes. It is not until next month when the V-formations migrate south.

As  many of you know, I have a heavy dose of Canadian blood in my veins. Almost a century's worth of snuggling into Prince Edward Island and Quebec. So, I feel as if the Canadian holidays are mine to celebrate by birthright.

However, I almost did not attend a thanksgiving dinner tonight. And it was not because of the food. I detest turkey dinners. But, I go because I like socializing with people who have backgrounds different than mine.




This year, those differences were starting to boil over in some very peculiar ways. Everyone knows President Trump has taken some rather strong positions concerning Canada on defense spending and trade issues. To be kind, some of his comments have been insulting. And a lot of my Canadian friends have taken it personally.

I cannot say I really understand the feelings. For the past 70 years of my life, lots of people have attacked The States in language that was every bit as personal. I let it slip off as background noise. Americans are accustomed to it.

I do not question the authenticity of Canadian outrage. But I have been shocked at how the attacks in reverse have been directed at individual Americans. Me included.

When the issue of Canada's managed dairy, egg, and chicken market came up during the NAFTA negotiations, I sought out a Canadian friend to discuss the intricacies of the policies. I thought it was fascinating that a president who had made protectionism a central part of his trade policy would see the economic weaknesses of the Canadian system.


My attempt at initiating that conversation did not get past the first sentence. When I asked my friend if he knew about the Canadian managed dairy system, he said he did. But, he was opposed to any change if Trump had proposed it. When I asked if there might be an economic case for reform that would enrich Canadian consumers, he said: "I don't care. If Trump is for it, I'm against it."

There was much about the Bush-Obama administrations I did not like. But I was always willing to discuss policies based on their merits and not on who had proposed the policy.

But, that is not where our common discourse lies. Politicians have personalized almost everything in public life, and what was public has now become politicized. In the process, dinner guests are left strolling over live hand grenades with each course.

And I did not want to spend another evening waiting for someone (possibly me) to explode into emotional rancor.

Instead of being a social coward, I braced myself and went to dinner. 

Nothing happened. Well, nothing bad happened.

We all had a good time talking about almost every possible topic except politics. Canadians are experts at being nice -- about being polite enough not to bother with the truth when a bit of social shine will suffice instead. 

It worked perfectly. There was none of the stilted conversation that hides unstated truths. Instead, Americans, Canadians, Mexicans, Swiss all behaved as perfect dinner guests celebrating the world of things for which we have to be thankful.

I am particularly thankful for being able to live in Mexico where I can occasionally horn in on another culture's holiday. So, to my hosts, my friends and acquaintances in our exotic expatriate world, Nicole (a reader who I finally met in person tonight), and the always efficient and friendly staff of Papa Gallo's, I thank you for a great night and an even better coming year.



Happy thanksgiving, mes amies.

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