I have been reading Donald Miller's latest book (A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life) for the last few weeks.
Rather, I have not been reading it.
The combination of my trips around Mexico and my brief trip to Oregon have serialized the book into four or five page installments. But I finally finished it on my return to Melaque on Saturday.
Near the end of the book, Miller writes about a bicycle tour he made across America to raise money for a charity.
When you fly across the country in an airplane the country seems vast; but it isn't vast. It's all connected by roads one can ride a bike down. If you watch the news and there's a tragedy at a house in Kansas, that guy's driveway connects with yours, and you'd be surprised by how few roads it takes to get there. The trip taught us that we were all neighbors, that my life is connected to everybody else's.
I thought of that quotation while reading a message board posting this past week. It was written
Justin Horner -- a graphic designer in my home town of Portland, Oregon.
Let's turn the floor over to him to tell his story.
During this past year I’ve had three instances of car trouble: a blowout on a freeway, a bunch of blown fuses and an out-of-gas situation. They all happened while I was driving other people’s cars, which for some reason makes it worse on an emotional level. And on a practical level as well, what with the fact that I carry things like a jack and extra fuses in my own car, and know enough not to park on a steep incline with less than a gallon of fuel.
Each time, when these things happened, I was disgusted with the way people didn’t bother to help. I was stuck on the side of the freeway hoping my friend’s roadside service would show, just watching tow trucks cruise past me. The people at the gas stations where I asked for a gas can told me that they couldn’t lend them out “for safety reasons,” but that I could buy a really crappy one-gallon can, with no cap, for $15. It was enough to make me say stuff like “this country is going to hell in a hand basket,” which I actually said.But you know who came to my rescue all three times? Immigrants. Mexican immigrants. None of them spoke any English.One of those guys stopped to help me with the blowout even though he had his whole family of four in tow. I was on the side of the road for close to three hours with my friend’s big Jeep. I put signs in the windows, big signs that said, “NEED A JACK,” and offered money. Nothing. Right as I was about to give up and start hitching, a van pulled over, and the guy bounded out.He sized up the situation and called for his daughter, who spoke English. He conveyed through her that he had a jack but that it was too small for the Jeep, so we would need to brace it. Then he got a saw from the van and cut a section out of a big log on the side of the road. We rolled it over, put his jack on top and we were in business.I started taking the wheel off, and then, if you can believe it, I broke his tire iron. It was one of those collapsible ones, and I wasn’t careful, and I snapped the head clean off. Damn.No worries: he ran to the van and handed it to his wife, and she was gone in a flash down the road to buy a new tire iron. She was back in 15 minutes. We finished the job with a little sweat and cussing (the log started to give), and I was a very happy man.The two of us were filthy and sweaty. His wife produced a large water jug for us to wash our hands in. I tried to put a 20 in the man’s hand, but he wouldn’t take it, so instead I went up to the van and gave it to his wife as quietly as I could. I thanked them up one side and down the other. I asked the little girl where they lived, thinking maybe I’d send them a gift for being so awesome. She said they lived in Mexico. They were in Oregon so Mommy and Daddy could pick cherries for the next few weeks. Then they were going to pick peaches, then go back home.After I said my goodbyes and started walking back to the Jeep, the girl called out and asked if I’d had lunch. When I told her no, she ran up and handed me a tamale.This family, undoubtedly poorer than just about everyone else on that stretch of highway, working on a seasonal basis where time is money, took a couple of hours out of their day to help a strange guy on the side of the road while people in tow trucks were just passing him by.But we weren’t done yet. I thanked them again and walked back to my car and opened the foil on the tamale (I was starving by this point), and what did I find inside? My $20 bill! I whirled around and ran to the van and the guy rolled down his window. He saw the $20 in my hand and just started shaking his head no. All I could think to say was, “Por favor, por favor, por favor,” with my hands out. The guy just smiled and, with what looked like great concentration, said in English: “Today you, tomorrow me.”Then he rolled up his window and drove away, with his daughter waving to me from the back. I sat in my car eating the best tamale I’ve ever had, and I just started to cry. It had been a rough year; nothing seemed to break my way. This was so out of left field I just couldn’t handle it.In the several months since then I’ve changed a couple of tires, given a few rides to gas stations and once drove 50 miles out of my way to get a girl to an airport. I won’t accept money. But every time I’m able to help, I feel as if I’m putting something in the bank.
When one of the lawyers asked Jesus how to inherit eternal life, Jesus responded with the two great commandments: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself.”
The lawyer, smelling the possibility of a loophole where he could minimize his love-sharing, asked: "And who is my neighbor?" You can hear the subtext dripping from the question: "Certainly not the people I do not like."
In response Jesus told a parable that is certainly one of western civilization's top ten tales -- the parable of the good Samaritan. A story of how people we distrust are included in that category "neighbor."
I have been reading the Old Testament lately. The torah repeatedly warns the reader to be especially mindful of the needs of three groups of people. Widows and orphans are on everyone's list. But the third group might surprise some people who draw their political inspiration from The Bible.
Aliens. Immigrants. Strangers in the land.
I have heard several people tell of tales similar to Mr. Horner's of the kindness of Mexicans in the United States -- and in Mexico. People with very little money who are always willing to share one commodity -- their time and hands. The very virtues we honor as Americans.
The highway that connects Portland to that driveway in Kansas keeps right on going -- to Ciudad Juarez, Oxaca, even Melaque.
Maybe that should be part of the immigration debate. A little consideration on whether we are measuring the correct virtues.
Just a question for thought.
The lawyer, smelling the possibility of a loophole where he could minimize his love-sharing, asked: "And who is my neighbor?" You can hear the subtext dripping from the question: "Certainly not the people I do not like."
In response Jesus told a parable that is certainly one of western civilization's top ten tales -- the parable of the good Samaritan. A story of how people we distrust are included in that category "neighbor."
I have been reading the Old Testament lately. The torah repeatedly warns the reader to be especially mindful of the needs of three groups of people. Widows and orphans are on everyone's list. But the third group might surprise some people who draw their political inspiration from The Bible.
Aliens. Immigrants. Strangers in the land.
I have heard several people tell of tales similar to Mr. Horner's of the kindness of Mexicans in the United States -- and in Mexico. People with very little money who are always willing to share one commodity -- their time and hands. The very virtues we honor as Americans.
The highway that connects Portland to that driveway in Kansas keeps right on going -- to Ciudad Juarez, Oxaca, even Melaque.
Maybe that should be part of the immigration debate. A little consideration on whether we are measuring the correct virtues.
Just a question for thought.
39 comments:
Gas stations can no longer lend you a gas can since they would be liable for damages should you or you crapped out car go up in flames. Passerbys are afraid of legal entailments getting involved with strangers. The good samaritan law was recently struck down in court.
Mexican immigrants dont have these fears since even the notion of being sued for lending out a gas can is incomprehensible. They are free of the stigma of the U.S. legal system that hammers us every day of our lives.
As far as joining the immigration debate, must I remind you that there is none, the GOP has forbidden it.
We have the free movement of money and product but heaven forbid we let people move about at will. Nice post Mr. Cotton.
Wonderful, wonderful post! Should shame us uptight, fearful, selfish and me-first Americans. Those with the least have the most.
Unquestionably, if your car breaks down, you're better off on a Mexican highway than in the United States. My new paisanos are far better in that area than is your average Gringo. I don't think, however, that you can take this fact and make it an argument for an open border or somehow excuse entering a country illegally.
Enact and enforce reasonable immigration laws on one hand, and on the other hand hope that you get lucky on the interstate when your car breaks down, and it's a Mexican national that passes by. But he should have a visa.
Quite correct in the damage lawyers have done to many aspects of U.S. society.
But the GOP has not forbidden any immigration debate. Both parties are responsible for the mess. And both GOP and Democratic administrations too.
I wonder if the debate should about haves vs have nots. I had a group of gringos with me last week. The poorest of the gringos (two without decent jobs, living with relatives without jobs!) had the most to give: time and money wise. The richer? One even demanded me to serve her more! I apparently didn't serve her enough by the last day of the trip. I left her alone at the taco table. Poor rich lady. She had to pick one up herself.
It is hard to say if my former profession caused the problem or if American neuroses drove the legal system to do what it did. Either way, our dimished personal responsibility has drastically affected our better natures. Americans will reach into their pockets to give people in need a hunk of their wallet. But we will not give time or personal attention.
I am not certain you are correct about the political flavor, though. Of my friends who are in favor of rational immigration reform, all are Republican. I suspect the dividing lines are a bit more complex than the news programs portray.
Free movement of labor is an important component of any free trade system.
For some people, time is just too precious to share. I have noticed that most of my Mexican neighbors are always willing to share it with me.
In theory, I would like borders to be open to the free flow of capital and labor -- without a lot of restrictions on how either is applied. I know that is not going to happen. But we can discuss the topic with some consideration for the people who are the subject of the issue. I have been a bit shocked at how Latin American immigrants (mostly illegal) are portrayed in the American press. Part of that stems from the obsessive focus on Mexico's drug war.
I have a certain admiration for people who successfully struggle to get across a border. It probably has to do with a couple hundred years of genes with familiy members sailing oceans and crossing frozen plains to end up in Oregon. And then I end up in Mexico. Go figure.
And both parties continue to muck up the issue for some rather small political gains.
There is something to be said about the haves and have nots analysis. Jesus correctly noted that there is nothing inherently wrong with wealth. It is what we humans do with it that causes the spiritual problem. Like monkeys who grab a banana in a jug, we would rather starve than turn loose of our prize. Amazingly, most Americans are quite generous with their money when they are called on to open their wallets. But we can be very stingy with our time. And, if any risk to the person is even a possibility, we scurry for safety.
If we spent more time thinking about the needs of others, we would be far better off in our hearts.
Excellent. Thanks for sharing this. I wish that stories like this one could reach a wider audience. Unfortunately the media in the US are not interested.
There is hope. The New York Times picked up the story.
first a smile, then tears rolled down my cheeks! what a beautiful story! people helping those in need, and not expecting pay or accepting pay, regardless of their own circumstances-priceless! i am sure the pay that mexican family received was the joy that they were able to help someone in need. bravo to them and all the wonderful people who carry on these selfless acts. as they say, pay it forward.
You put your finger on what makes the story priceless. When the Old Testament instructs the Israelites to be thoughtful of aliens, it always comes with a reminder -- because you were once a stranger in Egypt. I try to remember that as I drive around. This country has made my heart softer in many ways.
"I know this is not going to happen", as with all policy, if there are too many loose strings sticking out, it all comes unwound in the end. I think our policy in North America where money and goods have fancy feet, yet the people are told that their movement is a crime, is a very loose string. The reactionary politics of the US can not last forever, I think the last election was a bit of a fluke because of the poor turnout and now with the GOP running up the score, the turnout will be different next time. The last election cleaned out the last of the bluedogs, we are going to see a different debate from the next Congress. The increase in Latin voters in the US will drive this debate.
Voters have a way of punishing parties who overreach. They did it to the Republicans four years ago and to the Democrats two years ago. The small group of independents who decide elections are now interested in cutting spending. We will see if they have the appetite to accept the type of cuts that are needed -- such as increasing the retirement age, reducing Social Security and Medicare benefits, eliminating the charitable and mortgage deductions, simplifying the tax code. Because immigration reform does not deal with the spending issue, it is not going to be a starter for either party in the near term. Both parties have dreadful demagogic records that will not easily be turned. Once spending is under control, those independent voters may be interested in tackling the immigration issue. But not before. There are no saints in politics.
Great Blog today... enjoyed it immensely.
Brush off my crystal ball: inflation is coming-printing money day and night and unfunded wars trash the value of any currency. We will be paying for old dollars with new half price dollars. Tax income will increase because taxes are based on percentages. . As to the social entitlements, knocking the cap off withholding taxes for SS puts a bandage on that problem, at least the public pension plan part. One part is going to happen no matter what and if things play out the way I see them in the next election, the cap on SS taxes in all income areas will be toast. I think the mortgage deduction will get a cap, maybe even pro-rated by housing markets. I think the charitable deduction will stay, we are after all, messing with church funding in that area.
And that is why we do not talk politics very much here. It is seldom interesting and never edifying.
Thanks. It is nice to recall that beautiful things happen around us every day -- and we can choose to be part of it.
Aren't you a lawyer? ;)
Love God and love people...
It is your football. I'm sorry I was stuck inside by a cold rain and had way too much time to waste typing.
An absolute message for today and everyday. We had the same thing happen to us in Newfoundland. Had just gotten off the ferry from Nova Scotia when the flat happened. A young man on his way home stopped and fixed it. We should all pass kindness on, and stop looking at others as if they are different, just because their language or the color of their skin is different.
I am a recovering lawyer. I truly am getting better.
I once liked politics. So much so that I ran for office. But those days are gone. I am enjoying living in Mexico where we all pretend that the government matters, and then live as if it didn't. Rather a libertatrian not-so-paradise.
I agree. If we see ourselves as being on the same highway with one another, our lives will be so much better.
great post I downloaded the book already and am about a third of the way into it......thanks Steve!
Wow, Steve. Just "wow".
It's a nice tale, isn't it? And in your back yard.
And wisdom to know the difference....
Don't turn all Assisi on me, now.
Great post Steve, It brought tears to my eyes. It does seem to me in my experience that those with less can be more generous. Thanks for the reminder. Jan in Mississippi
And a reminder for us to be a little more generous with our hands and time.
Thanks Steve for listing the book, I downloaded it from Amazon to my Kindle yesterday and am about 1/3 through it.
I would love to hear your overviews on how liability phobia has chainged life NOB and what your solution would be to remedy the situation.....you never know when I may need to borrow a gas can from someone.....
Beautiful post. Thanks for sharing.
I think the world would be a better place if more people realized that we are all in this together. No one here but us humans. And the Mexicans seem to realize this better than the Americans.
Saludos,
Kim G
Boston, MA
Where I do try to be helpful to strangers, but first often have to remember that I'm not in as much of a hurry as I think.
It is a good book. Tell me how you enjoyed it when you finish.
One of the biggest mistake the American legal system made was whittling back the common law defenses of contributory negligence and assumption of risk. Both were based on the common sense notion that people should be responsible for their own mistakes.
But we were entering a world where personal responsibility was seen as an impediment to keep trial lawyers like John Edwards out of mansions purchased with insurance company money. And we have all paid the social price for it. I suspect there is no going back.
It is one reason I moved down here.
We probably should be fair and point out that the issue may be wealth and not nationality. I have run into rich Mexicans who wiould no more share their time than would the average upper middle class American.
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