phones, ships, and passports

Most people are great at churning out advice. Fewer are quite as good at following it.

As much as I like traveling, it does have its frustrations. And, as fate would have it, most of my frustrations are caused by me not following my own advice.

Let's start with telephones. I no longer have the need for a cellular contract in The States. But I do travel north enough that I need access to an easy way to switch from Mexican service to American service.

And I thought I had found that "easy way" several years ago. I use Telcel services in Mexico. When I fly north, I buy a month's worth of data service online. When my flight lands in Los Angeles, I switch out my Telcel SIM chip for a T-Mobile chip. And I am ready to go for the month.

That plan works if my smartphone has been unlocked.

For some reason, on this trip, I could not re-new my monthly service with T-Mobile online. So, I needed to wait until Sunday morning to talk to a sales representative in person. When I did, I ran into my first problem. The monthly plan I had been using no longer exists. That happens in the cellular world.

So, Daniel offered me another option. Of course, a bit more expensive. Then, problem two crashed on my head.

When asked, I tell people who travel to buy an international cell phone that has been unlocked. The telephone will accept almost every chip around the world -- with the exception of some in southeast Asia.

Well, I did not follow my advice. When I bought my current Samsung Galaxy 9 Plus, I forgot to ask the clerk if it had been unlocked. It hadn't.

There are ways to unlock locked telephones. But Telcel has quite effectively hidden the key hole on mine.

Rather than wait any longer, I bought an entry-level cell phone and a monthly plan that would cover me for data for the month month I am away from Mexico. That is why I need a telephone up here -- as a mobile computer. I make and receive perhaps seven calls a month.

Now, I need to walk around with two cell phones in my pants -- looking vaguely like a Melaque drug dealer.

That was the easy problem. When I returned to the house, I looked at a letter that had been forwarded from my house in Reno. For a moment, I felt sick.

Most cruise lines will not allow passengers to board if there are not 6 valid months remaining on the passenger's passport. Mine expires in early February.

And I knew both of those facts. Worse, I have lectured people who head off to cruises with inadequate time on their passports.

I had even started the renewal process last August. In my head. While I was in San Miguel de Allende, I had planned on submitting my passport to the satellite consulate office there. For some reason, I didn't.

When I returned to Barra de Navidad, I intended to drive to the consulate in Guadalajara while I was in the big city looking for furniture. That didn't happen, either.

I thought about the renewal a couple of times and then dismissed my concern because I had plenty of time to renew my passport after it expired in February and before I left for Australia in March. Apparently, I had just blown off my own 6-month advice.

All day Monday, I was on the telephone with a passport expediting service, and filling out several forms. For reasons that are not important, this passport would be treated as a lost passport. That meant more forms and more money.

After visiting the Deschutes County Clerk to place my documents in a government-approved sealed envelope (as if I were some sort of provisional voter), I shipped the whole pile off to Texas through the good graces of FedEx. It arrived in Houston this morning. I am almost $1,000 (US) lighter in my checking account.

Now, I wait. I fly to Miami on Monday morning and will be in a hotel until the cruise on Friday morning. Thanksgiving will kill one --if not two -- business days in the renewal process. If the passport does not arrive at the hotel by Thursday evening, I will need to make some non-cruise plans.

Usually, I am a very optimistic person. But there is something about this process that unnerves me. As far as the State Department is concerned, I currently have no passport. Returning to Mexico will not be possible until the US Government sends me something.

Here is a piece of advice. Always listen to your own good advice.

And here is another good piece of advice -- or, at least, a sincere wish.

May you all have a Happy Thanksgiving.