Sunday, March 24, 2019

a study in black and white



By nature (and practice), I am not a handyman.

Most men learned the details of electrical wiring and replacing broken windows from their fathers. That was not my Dad's forte.

He knew everything about the trucking business, but he definitely was not the guy who would help you install a ceiling fan. That was my Uncle Frank (i never sang for my father).

I have learned to do a number of repairs relying only on my own skills. But if it is much more than changing a water filter or replacing light bulbs, I call in the experts.

And I did just that with our latest two household malfunctions.

Both of the refrigerators in the kitchen recently decided to emit banshee noises -- mainly in the night. At first, I thought the compressors were dying. But I know that sound from years of killing refrigerators by keeping my northern houses too cold.

This was a completely different sound -- a sound I had heard before. And I thought I had diagnosed the problem. A fan was freezing up. And sure enough, that was it.

The father of Omar's girlfriend came over, pulled out the fans, and installed new ones. I think I could now replicate his work. Before he came, I had no idea where the fan was located. The only question now is where I could buy the parts. But that would just be a matter of asking neighbors.

Replacing my toilet seat should have been an easy task. I had replaced a couple in Salem. And, over the past few years, I have had to replace all six of the toilet seats in the house.

I had no desire to repeat the process. It is a real pain. Literally. And I do not mean that as Joe Biden uses the word.

The Chinese-designed toilets installed in the house are almost sculptural. And they function perfectly doing what toilets should do.

The problem is getting at the bolts that hold the toilet in place and the securing the seat. They are hidden in a recess behind the toilet that requires a deeper reach and more agile fingers than I now possess.

My neighbor Mary uses a handyman called Donny.  He did such a good job of cleaning my sidewalk, I hired him to fix my toilet seat. It took him almost a half hour.

Even if I had known how to do both tasks, I would probably have hired someone to do them. It is good to live easily and to share the money I have earned.

It was also easy on the wallet. The labor for the refrigerator repair for two consecutive days cost me about the equivalent of $60 (US). Donny originally charged me only $2.50 (US) for installing the toilet seat. I gave him the equivalent of $10 (US).

And, best of all, I now know handy skills that I can pass on to my own son. His position is that it is better to hire other people to do those tasks.

Smart kid.

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