Saturday, April 24, 2010

spam wars


I have been withholding information from you.


That means that I have been violating a pact between free citizens.


We need information to make the important decisions in our lives.  Without it, we may as well be -- Cuba.


So, let me 'fess up -- as pilot friend from Oklahoma would say.  Because I have some 'splainin' to do.


Apparently the spam generators have discovered a new way to spread their net of knowledge.  They now pose as commenters on blogs.  And from the exotic alphabets and grammar structure, many of them must live in China, Russia, Romania, and India.


And tyrant that I am, I have been simply deleting the comments.


In my more enlightened stage, I have concluded that I am keeping you from buying inexpensive prescription drugs (of unknown provenance).  Investing in Mexican real estate with a guaranteed return of 175% in 16 months (specific numbers always numb the intellect).  Viagra (even in cream form to avoid any claims of sexism).  And pornography (in every imaginable form -- the grease that keeps the internet spinning).


I beg your forgiveness.  After all, I do not need to end up on a lamp post -- like Hugo Chavez's look-alike.


So, if any of you need this valuable information, just let me know.  Because I have the inside scoop on how to get my hands on a cool million dollars merely by handing over my bank account information to --


Well, you get the picture.